8 years and still counting

Our family chain is broken
and nothing seems the same
but as God calls us one by one
the chain will link again

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“You left us peaceful memories
your love is still our guide
and though we cannot see you
you are always at our side”

 

August 27, 2009

One of the most memorable day in our lives- yun na din pala ang huling celebration natin ng anniversary nyo ni Mommy. I would never forget na pinakanta mo si ann sa videoke till 1am- parang ayaw mo ng matulog- ayaw mo matapos ang araw na iyon. Nag rereklamo na si mommy pero hyper kami pareho ni ann at game makipag kantahan pa sayo. Then before pa tayo matulog- bigla mo ako tinanong bakit di pa kami mag pakasal ng bf ko that time. Nagulat ako kasi- alam ko ayaw mo pa ako mag asawa noon. Pero suddenly you wanted me to do it. Sabi mo- iba pa din ang may kapartner sa buhay dahil hindi magtatagal iiwan nyo din kami ni mommy. It was weird conversation- pero since palabiro ako – dinaan ko nlng sa biro din. Sabi ko sayo- I can’t find na sing gwapo mo para pakasalan ko. And I rest assure you that I ll be fine even I am alone, even i don’t have a partner . I didn’t realized- hudyat na pala un nag pag papaalam mo. And you know Dad- its been 8 years and nothing changed. I am still the tough lady you left, still single and unmarried. Pinatapang lalo ako ng panahon mula ng iniwan mo kami. Many times nalulungkot but mostly because we missed you badly. Ang hirap since you’ve left us. It’s like being more responsible for our family. May times natatakot ako- making big decisions especially sa restoration ng bahay but good thing – lahat ng tinuro mo at natutunan ko sa kurso nagagamit ko sa ngaun. My life changed deliberately since you left. I learned  the hard way- pati sa pagpili ng kaibigan and how to manage our time.

Sabi nila- makakalimot din kami- makaka move on- maybe yes- na accept na naming wala kana pero un pain and struggle ng wala ka Ama to turn to still makes us sad most of the time. Dasal nalang namin ikaw pede makasama- minsan sa panaginip. No matter how hard we tried to make our family happy sa mga okasyon but still- at the end of the day- may lungkot pa din- na miss ka namin ni mami at anna. Life was never been the same without you. Maybe we have the four solid years with you since you retired from Saudi. Akala nila madali, akala ng iba habang tumatagal makakalimutan na- pero in reality not- habang tumatagal lalong sumasakit . Hindi mababago ng pag kawala mo ang lungkot sa tuwing may achievements kami sa career and you are not there anymore to sahre it with. Lalo na po ngaun nasa Nestle ako, marami pag kakataon gusto ko ibalita sayo ang mga bagay na naaachieve ko in little time that i was a part of that organization. Siguro if buhay ka, you will be proud of me at malamang mas madalas hatid at sundo mo ako plus may road trip pa tayo.  Yung mga biglaan lakad ng family where you are the leader of h pack, Yung panonood natin sa bahay pag weekends, yung alalay ko sa pag luluto tuwing may okasyon sa family, Ang kasama ko mag canvass ng mga pede pa gawin to improve our house. Ang meron Ama makakausap para mag bigay ng payo pag dumarating ang sandali napapag hinaan kami sa buhay. Ngaun dasal at sa mga libro iniwan mo ako nakasandal. I guess makakasanayan na lang. I still keep on praying for that one day- everything will be just ok.

Daddy- akala ko nga sinusundo mo na ako noong August 15 eh- after ng first day of Training ko sa BOSH, i missed you then so much especially during the lectures ng EE and ME, lahat ng naituro doon , you have practically taught me pag may ginagawa ka sa bahay at ako ang alalay mo, maybe i was too emotional then and I almost have the same case as yours. Pero nag dasal ako sa Ama wag muna- kailangan pa ko ni mommy at anna. I am not afraid to die anymore unlike noon. Kasi alam ko Ikaw ang susundo sa akin diba? promised mo yun . For now Daddy- please watch over me- pls continue to guide me sa major decisions that I will make for our family. Ikaw lang nakaka alam ng ugali ko. Alam mo pag nag daramdam ako,pag napapagod na ko. Sana Dad magampanan ko pa un mga bilin mo- mga bagay na di mo natapos . Mahirap pero nagagawa ko mag pakatatag pa para kay mommy at mga kapatid ko.

At kung may darating man- I guide mo po ako,  bigyan mo po ako ng blessings  na wag ako mag kamali sa pag pili ng pag kakatiwalaan ko ng puso ko. I guide nyo po ako ng Ama – sa mga darating pa araw ng buhay ko.

God pawiin nyo sana mga lungkot namin sa tuwing ma miss namin si Daddy. Sa mga sandali kailangan namin ng guidance sa buhay. Gabayan nyo po ang bawat isa sa amin na maging matuwid sa pamumuhay. naway balang araw- sa pag katapos ng aming takbuhin pag bubuklurin mo po kami na mag kakasama muli sa bayang banal.

Daddy,  will always be the big star I look up at every night.

I missed you so much Honey pop –

your little star,

Pipay

August 27, 2017- Diary Journal/ 02:39am

 

 

 

 

Butterfly and Kisses

For butterfly kisses after bedtime prayer;
sticking little white flowers all up in her hair;
Walk beside the pony, Daddy, it’s my first ride.”
“I know the cake looks funny, Daddy, but I sure tried.”
Oh, with all that I’ve done wrong, I must have done something right
To deserve a hug every morning And butterfly kisses at night.

Butterfly kisses after bedtime prayer;
sticking little white flowers all up in her hair.
“You know how much I love you, Daddy,
But if you don’t mind I’m only gonna kiss you on the cheek this time.”
Oh with all that I’ve done wrong I must have done something right
to deserve her love every morning and butterfly kisses at night.

Happy Father’s Day Daddy!

 

Sending hugs and kisses to the moon and back.

Fly me to the moon…

Oh it’s often use many words to say a simple thing
It takes thought and time and rhyme
To make a poem sing
With music and words I’ve been playing

For you I have written this song
To be sure you known what I’m saying
I’ll translate as I go along

Fly me to the moon,
And let me play among the stars.
Let me see what spring is like,
On jupiter and mars.
In other words, hold my hand,
In other words, darling kiss me.

Fill my heart with song,
And let me sing forever more,
You are all I long for,
All I worship and adore,
In other words, please be true,
In other words, I love you.

 

I love you for sentimental reasons…

I love you for sentimental reasons
I hope you do believe me
I’ll give you my heart

I love you and you alone were meant for me
Please give your loving heart to me
And say we’ll never part

I think of you every morning
Dream of you every night
Darling, I’m never lonely
Whenever you are in sight

I love you for sentimental reasons
I hope you do believe me
I’ve given you my heart

 

**Daughter’s thoughts on Father’s day

One of the songs you used to sing with us is now played on the radio- na alala kita dad at namiss bigla, it’s gonna be 8th year without you on father’s day. I hate going to the malls this week because it reminds me of you so much- 8 yrs na pala ako wala binibilhan ng gift pag father’s day. Na miss ko ang malamig mo boses tuwing kakanta ka, pero mas hawig mo parin boses ni Elvis Presley at Paul Anka.  I will visit you again this Sunday.

#sweetmemorylane#honeypop#neverforgotten

 

Nobody loves me like you do…

Like a candle
Burning bright
Love is glowing in your eyes
A flame to light our way
That burns brighter everyday
But now I have you
Nobody loves me like you do
Like a leaf
Upon the wind
I could find a place to land
I dream the hours away
And wonder everyday
Do dreams come true
Nobody loves me like you do
What if I never met you
Where would I be right now
Funny how life just falls in place somehow
Oh you touched my heart in places
That I never even knew
‘Cause nobody loves me like you do
Mm I was words without a tune
I was a song still unsung
Poem with no rhyme
A dancer out of time
But now there’s you
Nobody loves me like you do

For you

Just to look in your eyes again, just to lay in your arms
Just to be the first one always there for you
Just to live in your laughter, just to sing in your heart
Just to be every one of your dreams come true
Just to sit by your window, just to touch in the night
Just to offer a prayer each day for you
Just to long for your kisses, just to dream of your sighs
Just to know that I’d give my life for you
For you, all the rest of my life, for you, all the best of my life, for you alone, only for you

Just to wake up each morning, just to have you by my side
Just to know that you’re never really far away
Just a reason for living, just to say I adore
Just to know that you’re here in my heart to stay
For you, all the rest of my life, for you, all the best of my life, for you alone, only for you
Just the words of a love song, just the beat of my heart
Just the pledge of my life, my love, for you

 

I miss you everyday and for always…You still have my heart till eternity.